Less Words


Breathing your love,
I want to master the art.
With less words,
How to occupy your heart?
I thought for many nights,
Under cloudless sky conniving with the stars.
Intoxicated with your love,
Even the striking clock sounds like the guitar.
Neither, I can play with words,
Nor, I can weave a fable.
I get goosebumps on my body,
When we sit across the table.
You're a man of few words,
But, I'm little loquacious.
Fearing my utterance of useless words,
Project me as flirtatious.
So, the less words I want,
Can you help me, please?
Or else I'll say love you,
Every time I breathe.

Comments

  1. Yet another wonderful piece Saru... "Even the striking of clock sounds like guitar." - loved this line very much!! I assume you've lived and enjoyed each line you describe here... An unconventional approach to a common situation :) And kudos on crossing 10,000 page views :D

    ReplyDelete
  2. You rock in love poetry...heart piercing lines..so soft a theme and so softly said...I get the different intricacies of love in your poetry:-)

    ReplyDelete
  3. you know i keep running out of words to describe your work...your Romantic Quotient is increasing by the day...and so is the number of vivid images that you sneak in....in every single line...i can drink this one :)))

    ReplyDelete
  4. Saru... your words are almost divine...so well articulated...

    ReplyDelete
  5. Fantastic poem yaar.. Wonder how the guy (you mentioned in the poem) will react :)

    ReplyDelete
  6. saru in gujarati means nice. you are saru :)


    saru....marry me! ;)

    ReplyDelete
  7. awesome..:)
    your less words have left me out of words to comment on it.
    keep writing. :)

    ReplyDelete
  8. A classic piece...don't know but I like it the most from last few poems of yours..

    ReplyDelete
  9. Wonderful rhythm and what a feel you give! Your words have Magic, Saru! Keep Going :)

    ReplyDelete
  10. You have Amazing....Loved this one...keep it up.

    ReplyDelete
  11. You do breathe love Saru, maybe your heart also beats love in every blood cell..
    Else no one can come with such a piece!

    You're a man of few words,
    But, I'm little loquacious.
    Fearing my utterance of useless words,
    Project me as flirtatious.

    These lines really made me think, I said to myself "Isn't this the same case with you? This lady has expressed that feeling so beautifully!"

    ReplyDelete
  12. superb!! loved it :) u'r awesome!! love ya ;)

    ReplyDelete
  13. @spicy sweet : You wont believe it, but i was going to write the exact same thing.I could totally relate to those lines.

    @saru : Yet another beauty.The feeling is described so beautifully and intricately.I am amazed as to how can somebody word feelings so well.

    ReplyDelete
  14. So much LOVE! How do u manage to capture it?Saying i love you everytime i breath..i prefer less words.

    Lovelyeverytime i breath..i prefer less words.

    Lovely

    ReplyDelete
  15. you have struck bang on, yet again :)

    ReplyDelete
  16. for a change...i didnt quite like the start (1st 4 lines) coz i felt u write better...but then the progress you made thereafter was like - WOW!

    u didnt really leave me any option but to accept the deal ;)

    ReplyDelete
  17. Woowww! I never knew words can be so magical. Yet another lovely piece, Saru! Every line is equally fantastic :)

    ReplyDelete
  18. wow saru its magical ......... love its depth , love your wording .......fall in love with your poem ....... super ..... less word ... touch my heart .
    Breathing your love,
    I want to master the art.
    With less words,...... awasome .
    your love poem always spread smile on face and a dhuk-dhuk moments........ <3 <3 <3 <3

    ReplyDelete
  19. Wow!! Fabulous Saru. I loved that line 'Even the striking of clock sounds like guitar.' very nice :)

    ReplyDelete
  20. wow.. :) just amazing.. U r very very talented.. Love is such a wonderful feeling.. Nd d poem is even more wonderful...
    we r readin ur blog 4 d first tym.. Nd we are so so impressed by you..
    Keep writing.. Will definitely visit for more.. :) wow.. :) just amazing.. U r very very talented.. Love is such a wonderful feeling.. Nd d poem is even more wonderful...
    we r readin ur blog 4 d first tym.. Nd we are so so impressed by you..
    Keep writing.. Will definitely visit for more.. :)

    ReplyDelete
  21. How do you just keep doing it...every time..each time...your words never fail to impress!

    ReplyDelete
  22. awwww.. Is it introspection or random contemplation? I guess u have explored this emotion and its different shades- Love as everytime there is a different angle or rather a different expression in it. Good one! :)

    ReplyDelete
  23. i loved the last line...it summed up everything so beautifully... every guy would kill be to be with a girl how u've portrayed in the poem :)...

    i like the way in which u portray emotions.. so dreamy yet believable :)... i like it... a lot :)

    Take care and keep writing........

    ReplyDelete
  24. Experience goes beyond the reasoning mind,
    It is the heart that has wings, not the head..

    A perfect exhibit been displayed.Well done Saru!

    ReplyDelete
  25. Publish a book of your work please. I wanna keep them with me forever <3

    ReplyDelete
  26. As Always a beautiful piece ! Love this lines.Intoxicated with your love,
    Even the striking of clock sounds like guitar.

    ReplyDelete
  27. OH MY GOD!!! It truly brought goosebumps to me! And the ending is just out of the world!

    ReplyDelete
  28. This is absolutely WONDERFUL saru!
    Em speechless fantastic! I so fell in love with it

    ReplyDelete
  29. this is simply amazin....love defined beautifully...wen even clocks sound like stummin of guitar...o how i love tat thought....loved the write..:)

    ReplyDelete
  30. To say that you cannot do wordplay in your own post, it is highly underrating yourself, because I see the words dance to their own tune while they sit here on this blog page.


    Cheers,
    Blasphemous Aesthete

    ReplyDelete
  31. words are your slave saru :) and well, the ending couldn't get any better than that...

    ReplyDelete
  32. Sometimes we do not know how a word can change our lives. Love is such a word. May you get the love of your heart and may you be loved.

    ReplyDelete
  33. OMG..From where do you get these beautiful words...

    ReplyDelete
  34. Wah Wha saaru jee kya baat hai :) :) Loved every lines of this poem. The way it started was awesome.

    "Breathing your love,
    I want to master the art.
    With less words,
    How to occupy your heart?"

    Sooooper :)

    And this is my fav. line :)

    "Even the striking of clock sounds like guitar."

    Just loved it :)

    ReplyDelete
  35. Loved each line and loved the finish. Sharing it on FB.:)

    ReplyDelete
  36. Wow...what a flow.....enjoyed reading this :)

    ReplyDelete
  37. I read few poetry blogs. Not that I have a dislike for verses but most of them are either mechanical or cloying. Your diction is simple yet deeply touching. Good Work, Saru!

    ReplyDelete
  38. You say it best..when you say nothing at all :)

    ReplyDelete
  39. As usual, you have stolen all of us heart by very few words of your poem.
    "Even the striking of clock sounds like guitar", liked it alot. No more words. :-) ...

    ReplyDelete
  40. i tried my hand in poetry once, i cudnt get past the 2nd word even :) LOL.. ah love. 1 up Saru!

    ReplyDelete
  41. saru...there u go again, popping the charts this time :) Good show

    ReplyDelete
  42. the last two lines say it all for me :)
    lovely:)

    ReplyDelete
  43. Well said. Saying less is always more effective, especially if you choose the words rightly.

    ReplyDelete
  44. Lovely lovely.
    Love every word of your mater piece.
    Keep it coming.

    ReplyDelete
  45. @Anand- Thank you Anand, this poem is inspired by Kareena Kapoor's character in Jab We Met.:)

    @Nasnin Nasser- Thank you dear for such a nice comment.

    @India's no.1 blog- Thank you and believe me I'm in love with this comment!!!

    @Rahul- Thanks Sir...

    @डॉ॰ मोनिका शर्मा- Thank you Monica.

    @Binu Thomas- A guy can tell that better, thank you :)

    @kalpak n.- How Sweet:) :) :)

    @Ashwini- I think all girls can relate to it. Thanks dear for liking it.

    @Venkateswaran Ramachandran- Thanks RV...

    @Hemant- Thank you so much Hemant!!!

    @Arti- Thanks for such a lovely comment...

    @deepbaazigar- Thanks.

    @Spicy Sweet- Thanks dear, you write so beautifully, even this comment reflects your magic...Love it!!!

    @Niya- Thanks :)

    @Upasana- Thanks Upsana:) :) :)

    @Red Handed- Thank you so much!

    @A grain of sand- Thank you!

    @sawan- Thanks:)

    @Rohit Sareen- Thanks Rohit both for the comment and picture:)

    @Harsha- I always look forward to your comment, thanks dear:)

    @shashi purwar- Thanks Shashi, your comment made my day:) <3 <3 <3

    @--- Bagya --- - Thanks Dear!

    @infallibleinfectiousidiots- Thanks Dear for such a wonderful comment and welcome here...:)

    @Kunal- Because I have lovely people like you around me...BTW thanks to FB:)

    @Shesha Chaturvedi- Thank you :)

    @Kitty- Thank you!

    @Ankur- Thanks Ankur...

    @Neeraj Dwivedi- Thanks Neeraj!

    @Thousif Raza- You always capture the essence of the poem so nicely, thanks from the bottom of my heart!

    @Being_AC- Thank you Sir!

    @Manali- I'm crossing my fingers for that, thank you:)

    @Angel- Thank you Angel.

    @Deepthi- Thanks Deepthi for such a generous comment!

    @Rosette Princess- Thank you so much dear:)

    @vaisakhi- Thanks a ton dear!

    @Blasphemous Aesthete- Thanks Anshul for such a lovely comment:)

    @Chintan- I'm glad you liked it...

    @ANULAL- Love is a powerful force...:)Thanks...

    @Neha- :) :) :)

    @SHANOJ K- Thanks!

    @Sunil Padiyar- Thank you Sunil for admiring it so nicely...

    @Satish Mutatkar- Thanks Sir!

    @Sourabh K Rao- Thank you:)

    @shveta- Thanks!

    @thephoenixarts- Thank you!

    @Sameera- Thanks dear...

    @⁂ܓVållῐ ⁂ܓ☺- Thank you:)

    @umashankar- Your comment made my day. Thanks...:)

    @jayendrasharan- Even I think so...

    @Little Heart- Thanks and your new picture is really very nice...

    @Jayanth- Thanks Jayanth...

    @the mind behind the mindless lampoons- Thanks Ravi :)

    @tarunima- Thanks :)

    @zephyr- I agree with you:) Thanks:)

    @Intex 4 Person Mariner Inflatable Boat Set Review- Thanks Dear and welcome here...

    ReplyDelete
  46. Ahh! Wonderful as always, dear Saru! I especially *love* the last 4 lines ~ excellent! ♥

    ReplyDelete
  47. "I thought for many nights,
    Under cloudless sky conniving with the stars." How creative and different and again drenched in lovely love.

    ReplyDelete
  48. So very wonderful!
    Hope you have a perfect weekend:-)

    ReplyDelete
  49. Nice! The last line was so sweet :)

    Sorry I haven't been following actively for a while. I was busy because of my exams.

    ReplyDelete
  50. I don't know how I missed this one, earlier this week, but let me say....thank you ~ this was magnificent!!

    ReplyDelete
  51. lovely words...beautifully crafted lines!

    ReplyDelete
  52. what an expression saru!
    In one word i can say "wow!" :)

    ReplyDelete
  53. Very interesting situation - the chatterbox and the silent one. I'm just wondering how 'funny' that would be.

    ReplyDelete
  54. @Team G Square- Thank you:)

    @~*Lady Fiona*~- Thank you so much, I was wondering how you would react to this poem. I'm glad you liked it!

    @Neeraj Kumar- Thanks Neeraj for such nice compliment:)

    @loangyan- Thanks!


    @Spiderdama- Thanks dear and you too enjoy the weekend:)

    @Charu- Don't be sorry Charu, that's more important. And, thanks for your comment!

    @alice alfred- Thanks dear, it happens with me as well...

    @Prabhavathi- Thank you!

    @Kalyan- Thanks...

    @sowmya- Thanks Sowmya:)

    @matheikal- That's very funny, I hope you have seen 'Jab We Met'...It's inspired from Kareena's character in that movie...

    ReplyDelete
  55. I am the chatterbox one.. Hope you had a great weekend Saru :)

    ReplyDelete
  56. OmG!,I can feel the touch of Luv in ur WORDS.Thanks for sharing it Saru!.

    ReplyDelete
  57. That is very nice! and romantic.. wow wow.. :)

    ReplyDelete
  58. Saru...lovely lines and somebody passionaltely in love can surely feel this-
    'the clicking of the clouds also seems like the music from the guitar!'

    Great one.

    ReplyDelete
  59. Woooooooooow...:):) amazinggg.. i had smile throughout whn i ws reading..!:):)

    ReplyDelete
  60. Amazing Saru.. Thanks for sharing such a wonderful poems with us...

    ReplyDelete
  61. Sincere, inspiring and romantic:)

    ReplyDelete
  62. this is so beautiful.... it has touched my soul....
    well done!!

    ReplyDelete
  63. Kudos! Love it the way you have crafted the words. All the emotions captured. Breathtaking!

    http://www.meghasarin.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
  64. You are tagged here Saru.And thank you!!

    http://myblawghh.blogspot.com/2011/10/first-shower-and-then-some.html

    ReplyDelete
  65. @Kiran @ KiranTarun.com- Hi Kiran, weekend was good, went to Harvard and MIT. I guess, everyone is a chatterbox...:)

    @MyKitchen Flavors-BonAppetit!.- Thanks Christy...:) Your presence grace my blog...

    @KP- Thanks KP :)

    @Shaifali- Thanks dear...

    @Ankitha- :) Thank you!!!

    @Swati- Thanks Swati:)

    @sajeevkmenon- Thank you so much...

    @Mr.Jovita- :) Thanks...

    @magiceye- Thank you Deepak Sir...:)

    @Arpitha Holla- Thanks Dear!

    @swati- Thank a lot Swati...

    @Megha Sarin- Thanks a on dear...:) :) :)

    @Upasana- I'm truly honored!!! Thanks:)

    ReplyDelete
  66. A Lonely night, at speed
    I thank you
    For this lovely read...
    And hopefully I await,
    To learn from you
    About poetry I write...Good Night!

    ReplyDelete
  67. @Bindu Juneja- Thanks Dear and welcome here!

    @Anoop Mathai Mathew- I think we both will learn from each other...Thanks for your beautiful comment!

    ReplyDelete
  68. You're welcome, looking forwarding to it :-)

    ReplyDelete
  69. lol... luk at 1 of your replies here?!,, "thanx dear and welcome here" even that's poetic... :-D

    ReplyDelete
  70. @Rajendra Raikwar- Thanks

    @r_Phoenix- At times my ranting also rhymes...Bad effect I guess...:)

    ReplyDelete
  71. Hi Saru, I have featured this poem of yours in this week's 'A Sneak From The Past'. You can check it out here: http://vinithadileep.wordpress.com/2015/01/07/a-sneak-from-the-past-5/

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Bricks, brickbats, applause - say it in comments!

Popular posts from this blog

Rewind - September 2023

I Am Not Alone

यूँ दो चार घंटे के लिए नहीं